kredz28
Stock
Blown and Intercooled!
Posts: 28
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Post by kredz28 on Apr 27, 2005 10:51:40 GMT -5
so i work at Westwood College as an admissions rep, and i have my own office composed of cubicles. The woman next to me is 26, brown hair with highlights, big c cup, bought 130 lbs and dead sexy. I am big into lifting, so this new mega whey protein has been making me fart all day. I assumed she was out of her office so i said "what the hell, No ones around, maybe i can get away with one."  So i lift my leg and let a massive one go, and it wouldnt stop coming out! Next I realize that it smells like DEATH and almost made me pass out. Next , I see her coming around the corner, so i quickly bust out this 3M Desk and Office cleaner and begin spraying it frantically trying to cover up the smell. she comes to my desk and said " doing a little bit of cleaning? OMG what is that smell??" I tried to blame it on the office spray, but the fart was just too potent. Story ends with this beautiful woman rolling her eyes and walking away.. felt like a totala$$  |
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Post by 94m6hardtopz on Apr 27, 2005 11:12:40 GMT -5
whatever, your a guy. she's rolling her eyes but now she has confirmation that you are straight. ;D
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Post by LS1MightyMouse on Apr 27, 2005 12:52:48 GMT -5
Haha i fart in class on purpose. I did it just last week during a test and when i blasted it, i turned around and gave the kid behind me a weird look and all thought it was him haha. But they all should have known it was me cause i let them rip allt eh time during the "quiet" moments haha specially during movies
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Post by Kevin on Apr 27, 2005 14:54:02 GMT -5
yea thats pretty funny....its weird tho because she is SOOO fine and i like older women. Im 20, shes 26....it was just an awkward situation. You guys shoulda smelled this one. I would have got up and walked away, but i would have crop dusted her pretty massively lol
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kredz28
Stock
Blown and Intercooled!
Posts: 28
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Post by kredz28 on Apr 27, 2005 14:55:22 GMT -5
the above post is mine BTW
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Post by LS1MightyMouse on Apr 27, 2005 16:26:14 GMT -5
;D
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Post by '68SuperchargedLT1Camaro on Apr 27, 2005 17:52:32 GMT -5
I'm laughing my ss off!! Hey KredZ28, I know what you mean about the protein. I used to use Optimum Nutrition "Pro Complex", and I would bust ss all day long. ;D Raymond |
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kredz28
Stock
Blown and Intercooled!
Posts: 28
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Post by kredz28 on Apr 27, 2005 18:32:35 GMT -5
well i WAS on this IDS weight gainer, and it would make me explode not 20 mins after taking it  One time i went lifting at night, got back and took the weight gainer, walked from my dorm to the appts across the street for a party, and when i got half way there, i had to $hit reallllllly bad, so i did a 180 and began running back to the dorms sure there was poop in my pants. The entrance to the dorms was on the other side of the building, so walking around the builing was not an option, simply no time. I ended up taking the screen out of my dorm window (my room was on the first floor THANK GOD) and climbed through the window only to trip on my bed and faceplant on the rough carpet. Story ends with me making it to the can, but if i would have walked around, i would have MAYBE gotten past the lobby before i pooped myself. Thank you for listening to this horrific story. |
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Post by LS1MightyMouse on Apr 27, 2005 22:22:20 GMT -5
I had one similar to that last night while at a girls homested. My stomach wasnt feelin to good (Might have been that full large pizza i ate that night) I was there at like 9 and had to leave at 10:30 cause my stomach was hurttin REALLY bad and i wasnt goin to drop a loaf off at her house. So i drove 40 miles in like 10 mins from her house to mine and that was RECORD time too. Needless to say i didnt make it to the bathroom on time. As soon as i parked my car in front of my house my pants were alrdy off and i was runnin to the door with my pants at my ankles and i could feel me not goin to make it and i realized my keys were still in my pocket at my ankles. So i ditched the pants and hopped the fence just to make it in time to let it all go by the side of the house. I hope no one goes over there cause that was a HUGE mess. Needless to say im sick too haha. Ive been pukin and takin massive dumps all day (im not here to impress anyone so this is why i told ya'll the story  ) |
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Post by 94m6hardtopz on Apr 28, 2005 7:48:50 GMT -5
ive had to take a dump pretty bad before, but you guys take the cake. ;D
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Post by LS1MightyMouse on Apr 28, 2005 10:27:45 GMT -5
Oooo i've got more stories but i dont think they would = good lounge talk ahaha
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kredz28
Stock
Blown and Intercooled!
Posts: 28
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Post by kredz28 on Apr 28, 2005 11:49:25 GMT -5
I had one similar to that last night while at a girls homested. My stomach wasnt feelin to good (Might have been that full large pizza i ate that night) I was there at like 9 and had to leave at 10:30 cause my stomach was hurttin REALLY bad and i wasnt goin to drop a loaf off at her house. So i drove 40 miles in like 10 mins from her house to mine and that was RECORD time too. Needless to say i didnt make it to the bathroom on time. As soon as i parked my car in front of my house my pants were alrdy off and i was runnin to the door with my pants at my ankles and i could feel me not goin to make it and i realized my keys were still in my pocket at my ankles. So i ditched the pants and hopped the fence just to make it in time to let it all go by the side of the house. I hope no one goes over there cause that was a HUGE mess. Needless to say im sick too haha. Ive been pukin and takin massive dumps all day (im not here to impress anyone so this is why i told ya'll the story ) so you had to walk in to your house with out wiping your butt? Man i hate that feeling. Did you do the staggered "keep my butt cheecks from touching" walk? |
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Post by LS1MightyMouse on Apr 28, 2005 12:39:20 GMT -5
so you had to walk in to your house with out wiping your butt? Man i hate that feeling. Did you do the staggered "keep my butt cheecks from touching" walk? Ya i had to walk really slow with clenching them really tight cause i was flowin pretty freely haha. My dog visted me while behind the fence, she left after being there only 5 seconds |
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Post by hipchic on Apr 28, 2005 14:45:34 GMT -5
I have decided that I am not going to touch this thread, you guys talk poop all you want. :-Xjavascript:adds("  ") lips sealed |
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Post by ZCRAZY8 on Apr 29, 2005 1:31:17 GMT -5
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!OMG!!!!!!!!!!! E-mail her and tell her that the can exceeded its experation date. Then tell her your thinking about switching up to Lysol.
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Post by 00MysticZ on Apr 29, 2005 2:12:10 GMT -5
haha you guys crack me up i had that happen to me when i ws loading on createain and taking wieght gainer when i was in football i was like 30 mins late for suiting up lets just say the coach ran me till i was sick as hell
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Post by LS1MightyMouse on Apr 29, 2005 10:05:06 GMT -5
haha you guys crack me up i had that happen to me when i ws loading on createain and taking wieght gainer when i was in football i was like 30 mins late for suiting up lets just say the coach ran me till i was sick as hell I always found time to take my dump just before practice for football and track so i would miss warm ups haha. I payed for it everytime but i wouldnt be in the awesome shape i am today if it werent for me slackin off haha |
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kredz28
Stock
Blown and Intercooled!
Posts: 28
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Post by kredz28 on Apr 30, 2005 10:33:35 GMT -5
I have decided that I am not going to touch this thread, you guys talk poop all you want. :-Xjavascript:adds(" ") lips sealed given some scary things regarding pooping us men have experienced, i dont even wanna know some of the females poop stories...i dont even think girls poop do they? |
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Post by LS1MightyMouse on Apr 30, 2005 17:14:12 GMT -5
i dont even think girls poop do they? Hahaha, ive never heard anything come out that end on a girl |
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Post by Scooter on May 2, 2005 21:42:31 GMT -5
Brings back old memories.
When I was in 4th grade (LONG time ago) there was this kid that that would wander around the classroom, pausing at a students desk to let off a "silent but deadly", then he would just casually walk away. He would do this every day.
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Post by 01SS346 on May 2, 2005 23:47:44 GMT -5
oh fu(k that was funny I was crying and could hardly breathe. Thats priceless and Joe I cant believe you do that in class... Im friends with the smelly kid....
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Post by CerwinVegaFan on May 9, 2005 0:48:33 GMT -5
ive had to take a dump pretty bad before, but you guys take the cake. ;D X2, the grossest thing I have done is try to take a dump at school and I forgot to put toilet paper on the seat.  |
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So i lift my leg and let a massive one go, and it wouldnt stop coming out! Next I realize that it smells like DEATH and almost made me pass out. Next , I see her coming around the corner, so i quickly bust out this 3M Desk and Office cleaner and begin spraying it frantically trying to cover up the smell. she comes to my desk and said " doing a little bit of cleaning? OMG what is that smell??" I tried to blame it on the office spray, but the fart was just too potent. Story ends with this beautiful woman rolling her eyes and walking away.. felt like a totala$$
One time i went lifting at night, got back and took the weight gainer, walked from my dorm to the appts across the street for a party, and when i got half way there, i had to $hit reallllllly bad, so i did a 180 and began running back to the dorms sure there was poop in my pants. The entrance to the dorms was on the other side of the building, so walking around the builing was not an option, simply no time. I ended up taking the screen out of my dorm window (my room was on the first floor THANK GOD) and climbed through the window only to trip on my bed and faceplant on the rough carpet. Story ends with me making it to the can, but if i would have walked around, i would have MAYBE gotten past the lobby before i pooped myself. Thank you for listening to this horrific story.
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